Messes & Tests

      So, here’s the thing…our lives can get pretty messy and can leave us feeling drained, lost, and discouraged. But can I propose that some, or most of that mess is our own making and is comprised of clutter and trash we haven’t thrown away or contained? Now to be clear, the clutter and trash I’m referring to is not physical, but if it helps you better understand what I’m trying to say, let’s use a house as a metaphor for the remainder of this conversation.

MESSES

     So, you’re the house and you have stuff everywhere. Your kitchen sink and counters are piled up with dirty dishes, your living room is decorated with junk and trash, and your bedroom looks like your closet exploded, leaving clothing and shoe debris as far as the eye can see. Clearly, this is not an easy way or the most appropriate way to live, but you’ve learned to function in your dysfunction so you may not even recognize there’s a problem (we’ll talk more about that in a different blog post). Now, let’s replace all the tangible objects I’ve just described with intangible things, such as anger, pain, jealousy, insecurity, anxiety, comparison, envy, selfishness, bitterness, control issues, doubt, fear, self-righteousness, pride, arrogance, vanity…this list could go on and on, but you get the idea. These intangibles are the clutter and trash that you have allowed to fill your house; to fill you and your heart, and because you haven’t cleaned your house, they’re spilling into different aspects of your life causing messes in your relationships, your finances, and even at your job.

      So how do we fix this? How do we clean up the messes in our lives? Well, what I’ve learned is that we first have to recognize that there is a mess, and that can only happen by acknowledging we have issues/clutter we need to either throw away or at least contain.

     I don’t know about you, but sometimes when I’m cleaning or reorganizing my physical home, it’s hard for me to throw things away because I attach meaning to them. Whether, it’s a card someone gave me ten years ago or a dress that I believe I’m going to fit into again, I create a reason why I have to keep those things. And we do the same thing with the intangibles. Someone broke our heart, so we have to hold on to that pain as a reminder to never trust anyone with our heart again. Or our friend gets a $10,000 promotion at work, but we can’t even negotiate a $2 dollar increase, so we harbor feelings of envy and anger that gradually turn into bitterness.

     Whether there’s a valid reason to feel anger, hurt, distrust, or other negative feelings, we can’t allow them to pile up and lie around because if we do, they’re going to cause a mess that we’re constantly tripping and falling over. We have to ask ourselves, is what we’re holding on to is beneficial?  Is it making our home look better and beautiful or is it preventative and ugly, and detracting from what could be beautiful? Once we can answer those questions honestly, then we’ll be better prepared to clean, and will hopefully be able to determine what should be trashed and what should be stored.

TESTS

     Not only do we encounter messes in our lives, but we also encounter tests. These pop quizzes seem to show up when we’re least prepared and challenge us to provide solutions for extremely difficult problems, such as, a loved one getting cancer, or a spouse walking out and demanding a divorce. How do we solve these problems when none of us have the cure for cancer, and none of us can force someone to love us if he or she chooses not to. Well, I’m not going to pretend that I have the answers to these problems or any of life’s tests. But what I do have is a suggestion…don’t give up.

     You don’t always know what you can achieve until you try. That may sound a little cliche or corny, but I’ve found it to be true. Some of my most difficult problems were solved because I simply took a chance. I chose to not give up and figure out my problem by applying whatever knowledge, experience, and resources I had at the time. And sometimes those resources were people who had already taken that same test. Now, obviously in the academic world, when you’re taking a test, you can’t ask a classmate for help or copy their answers, that would be cheating. However, in the real world you can do these things. Every test you take and every problem you solve gets recorded. These recordings (or testimonies, as we, church folk like to call them) become the knowledge, experience, and resources you pull from. And you, yourself become a resource that others can turn to when they’re taking their tests.

      Okay, so I just threw a lot at you so let’s recap/summarize our conversation. When your life starts looking like a hot mess, consider that “mess” to be a message alerting you it’s time to start cleaning house (aka your heart). And when life starts throwing pop quizzes and tests at you, don’t give up. Understand that tests are tools that stretch and strengthen our faith and resiliency, and help us build our character. They also enable us to be resources and gives us a testimony we can use to encourage others.

 

Until we speak again…Smooches

 

Are you currently living in a mess or facing a test?  What steps are you going to take clean-up or what experience, knowledge, or resources can you pull from to help you pass your test?